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I might have had better luck convincing them I was a a very lost and confused lesbian. I was bottoming out after talking to guy after guy for .
It was like a nightmarish game of dodgeball that would air on LOGO.
I tried to make my chest seem bigger, deepened my voice and swigged my sh***y beer like I was in a square state.
Alas, despite my greatest efforts, I was not a very convincing top.
That's how I imagine this gentleman felt, except that instead of being the smartest man in the room, he was the best-looking.
This was only heightened by the fact that most of the men at the event were, as I said, aggressively average -- like, community-college average. Most of the men were hilarious -- unintentionally, that is.